


Strip-Teasing

by Draco_Amante



Series: Drabble Challenge 2015 with Unkissed [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-23
Updated: 2015-04-23
Packaged: 2018-03-25 08:55:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3804418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Draco_Amante/pseuds/Draco_Amante
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Drabble Prompts: A chorus of “Pirate stripper Scorpius and the Scamander twins!” from my BTFs.</p>
<p>Also a bonus bit of inspiration thanks to this question: “Does he handle a stripper pole by any chance?” (Only if 'pole' is a euphemism.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strip-Teasing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [unkissed](https://archiveofourown.org/users/unkissed/gifts).



Scorpius decided he must have somehow stepped sideways into another universe, where everyone was crazy. It was the only possible explanation for why he was currently wearing a pirate costume.

“You’re doing this to get back at me, aren’t you? I highly doubt Lorcan seriously agreed to a costume party for his birthday.” Albus just shrugged, tugging on his own costume.

“I’m pretty sure Lysander pouted at him or something. Seriously, don’t underestimate Ly and his puppy-eyes, ok? You’ve no idea,” he replied, eyeing himself critically in the mirror. “What do you think of this one? I mean, Lysander might have been joking about his fairy princess costume, but I wouldn’t put it past him to be serious, and I want to sort-of match..?”

Scorpius sighs heavily and gives his ex a thorough once-over. Al is actually rather dashing in the traditional ‘Prince Charming’ look, although his wild hair somewhat spoils the effect.

“You look like a prat,” Scorpius mutters, trying not to be bitter. Technically they’ve both moved on, they’re trying to be friends for the twins’ sake, but he still occasionally wants to, well, kick Albus in the shins or something. It’s childish and unbecoming, but it seems that part of him is always going to be a bit childish and unbecoming.

Lorcan can never know about it.

“Look, if you don’t want to be a pirate, you don’t have to be. But I heard that Lorcan is going to be in some fancy historically accurate Naval Commander uniform, so if you want to go with it you could do a lot worse than an outfit that involves tight pants and high boots, while also being sort of ‘seaworthy’, yeah?” Scorpius hates it when Albus is right. Of course, if the bastard is lying about the Naval uniform, Scorpius is just going to have to kill him.

 

~0~

 

Al hadn’t been lying about the uniform. It was certainly making Scorpius grateful that he chose a costume with a bit of sex appeal - he couldn’t keep his eyes of Lorcan in the sharp lines and almost regal colours of his Naval Dress Uniform, and Scorpius had definite plans to remove it later.

Unfortunately, Albus kept smirking at him in an “I know what you’re thinking” sort of way, and Scorpius was dealing with it by getting drunk and, sadly, somewhat avoiding his sexy new boyfriend.

It wasn’t just the drink that really got Scorpius in trouble, however; he was also blaming Lysander for it.

Lysander Scamander was wearing the most scandalously tiny costume in the history of barely-there outfits. Aside from the glittering wings fluttering at his back, he wore ivy entwined around his naked body; just enough to hide the most shocking parts of himself and little enough that Scorpius could tell he was identical to Lorcan in every way, except maybe a few inches of height and a few pounds of muscle.

Scorpius had perhaps had 4 or 5 glasses of horrifyingly strong punch when Lysander sauntered over and suggested that what Lorcan really wanted for his birthday was a strip-tease. If he had been sober, he might have simply laughed Lysander off as politely as possible and prayed no-one had heard them talking, but the alcohol seemed to have broken down a few of the walls he’d built up and was now romping around inside his head suggesting all sorts of lewd confrontations…

 

So he found Lorcan, ripped off his shirt, and threw it at him.

 

~0~

 

The hangover was nothing compared to the humiliation. Scorpius could feel his father’s eyes on the back of his neck, but he certainly wasn’t about to look up.

“I don’t suppose you’d care to explain why Albus Potter dropped you off at Bloody Fuck Awful AM wearing nothing but underwear and boots?” Scorpius simply groaned in horror, and pretended not to hear Uncle Theo trying not to laugh (and not succeeding nearly as well as he might imagine).

“Are you… together?” Draco asked, clearly uncomfortable and trying to be diplomatic, and earning himself a truly horrified look.

“Like. _Hell_.” Scorpius bit out, and Draco decided to give up.

 

~0~

 

“Scorpius.”

“Lorcan! I’m so sorry, let me help you with those files-” It would be today, of all days, that he is forced to speak to Lorcan again. Scorpius had been doing so well, sticking close to the department yet never actually being in his office, and delicately avoiding all of Lorcan’s calls. He knew he was simply trying to dodge the inevitable break-up, but really, he couldn’t quite face it yet. And now, after the worst meeting of his life, he turns a corner and sends Lorcan’s top-secret Unspeakable files flying down the corridor.

Lorcan just arches an eyebrow in a way that would put Father’s eyebrow to shame, Summons the files and looks at Scorpius in a way that makes him feel oddly vulnerable.

“Why don’t you step into my office, Mr Malfoy?”

 

That tone is clearly not to be ignored, and Scorpius finds himself trailing after Lorcan with as much dignity as he can muster, smiling politely to people they pass and trying desperately to give off an air other than 'naughty child following the headmaster to his office'.

Lorcan Scamander’s office is a thing of beauty (if you like offices, anyway). When they step inside, Scorpius can’t help but be reminded of all of his little fantasies that have placed him over that elegant desk, or indeed under it in the footwell, or shoved up against the gleaming filing cabinets, or clinging to the towering shelves as-

“You’ve been avoiding me.” It’s a statement, and the fact that Lorcan has sat down in his imposing leather chair makes it feel like an awful interrogation.

Scorpius decides to counter this by being as ‘Malfoy’ as possible.

He sits in the chair opposite, leans back slightly (looking more at ease than he is) and drawls,

“Whatever do you mean?”

A dangerous tactic, and yet it works better than he could have hoped. Suddenly he’s being dragged out of his seat, kissed more passionately than ever before in his life, and thoroughly ground into those same filing cabinets he was just admiring. He so breathless and needy that when Lorcan pulls away he almost doesn’t register that there are words accompanying the movement.

“I believe I owe you a stip-tease.”

It is only when Lorcan (achingly slowly) slips out of his jacket and starts to pull at his own tie that Scorpius realises what is going on.

He gave Lorcan a drunken strip-tease in front of several of their friends and family members, and now Lorcan is giving him a strip-tease in his sexy office.

Lorcan’s version is much better.

The silk tie is being put to far better use as a gag, because Scorpius can’t stop the whimpering noises to save his life; and Lorcan’s posh Muggle-inspired business suit is slowly and neatly folded on the desk while he bends and turns just-so, to show off every etch of muscle to best effect.

And then he’s grinding that gorgeous naked body against Scorpius, and it’s heaven.

 

~0~

 

It’s months later when Scorpius finally gets up the nerve to ask Lysander why he goaded him into that drunken strip-tease in the first place, and the bastard actually laughs.

“Scorpius, I said ‘Lorcan wants to give you a strip-tease’ - _you’re_ the one who said you wanted to give him one first.”


End file.
